1. Elitist fans.

One thing I’m seeing more and more, perhaps since the dawn of Twitter and the instant, ill thought out response, is the dismissive way some fans treat other fans, as if their opinion doesn’t count because of some arbitrary matter like where they reside, or whether they are a season ticket holder or not. Some of the most interesting and insightful bloggers and commenters live out in the States, and to see their opinions swept aside because ‘Yanks don’t understand soccer‘ is patronising in the extreme, and downright rude to boot. I frankly couldn’t give a monkey’s whether you live in London, USA, Venezuela or squat on the steps of the Emirates – as long as you’re not a dick about it, your Arsenal opinion is as valid as anyone else’s.

A similar fate befalls those who do not possess season tickets, or even more ridiculously, haven’t held one for long enough. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen ‘I’ve been a season ticket holder for fifteen years‘ as a statement intended to win an argument, which is once again ludicrous. For the record, I am not a season ticket holder. I haven’t progressed far enough up to the list to be offered one, but even if I had, I wouldn’t be able to take it – a young family makes that financially impossible. Does that make my opinion irrelevant?

2. Divisive fan labels

It seems we live in a black and white world. You cannot praise the work of Arsene Wenger (even with caveats) or defend him against what you believe to be unfair criticism without someone shouting ‘AKB‘ at you (‘Arsene Knows Best‘, for those who don’t know the lingo of the keyboard warriors). Similarly, you cannot critique any of his decisions without being labelled a ‘doomer‘, or worse, a Spurs fan. Both sides are so protective of their side of the coin that any statement not fitting their notion is slammed, dismissed, and sees you wrapped up in their label of choice, before being unceremoniously pigeonholed and ridiculed.

What I find equally annoying is that once people pick a side, they interpret every news item in such a way as to back up their own preconceived perception. And let’s face it – it is possible to spin pretty much any story in either a positive or negative light, as we’ve seen countless times in the written press.

But what happened to the good old fashioned notion of reading a quote from a manager or player, and deciding rationally what you think of it before coming down on one side of the fence?

3. Sky Sports News

I haven’t subjected myself to much of SSN’s tripe this summer, because their endless headlines of ‘X not about to join Y‘ get pretty tiresome after a while. Not only that, but every time I flick over to it, Harry bloody Redknapp is talking about how his players aren’t for sale, how he needs to sign a few more players to progress and top players cost money, so would Levy please put his hand in his pocket for the millionth time so he can spunk another £18m on the likes of David Bentley.

Today, however, I watched a full hour. I’m not sure what was the reason for this self-imposed penance, but when the hour was up I knew precisely why I’d avoided it so long. They seem to have hired a new male presenter (I don’t know his name, I was too busy growling at his inaneness), who specialises in reporting on the dullest, most tenuous stories imaginable, and pumping them up to the extreme. Honestly, the guy is a complete self-parody.

It seems to get on Sky Sports News, or indeed any of their channels, you have to have an extreme opinion which stops being funny after about thirty seconds when the viewer realises that you aren’t taking the piss. That, or you have to be Harry bloody Redknapp.

4. People turning on Cesc Fabregas

This one really gets my goat. Despite my article semi-defending Samir Nasri, I know that his behaviour doesn’t sit well with many, and can completely understand that (and to an extent, I agree). However, the vitriol directed at Cesc is baffling.

Here is the situation as I see it: Cesc would like to move to Barcelona. He grew up there, his family live there and it is his boyhood club. So far, so logical. However, despite immense pressure from the club he idolises, he flatly refuses to antagonise for a move, because he loves and respects Arsenal too much. He also accepts (as he did last summer), that the end result will be dictated by the clubs, not by him, and is staying out of negotiations precisely because anything he says will weaken Arsenal’s hand. Ultimately, if Barcelona refuse to stump up the cash, he will give his all to Arsenal, as he always has done, for another year.

Now, I can’t see anything wrong in that, I really can’t. I sometimes think we get blinded by the fact that we love and support one club, and one club only. Cesc has two in his heart, a natural situation for a travelling footballer, but an alien one to fans across the world. So Cesc’s priorities are:

a) Do not do anything that destroys his relationship with Arsenal fans, which has been built up over seven years.
b) Do not do anything that destroys his relationship with Barcelona, a club he grew up in and will eventually return to.

So, given that, and given the media propensity for twisting anything he says, what exactly could he do that would make the current situation any better? If he says he wants to leave, he massively weakens our hand – this is precisely the action Barcelona are hoping for. If he says he categorically wants to stay, he is lying, and we will all see through it, and if he tries to explain the above situation as ‘I would love to go to Barcelona, but if they do not meet Arsenal’s valuation I will happily stay and proudly continue as captain’, this will be reported purely as ‘Cesc wants to go to Barcelona‘. We all know it.

So for me, silence is the best policy. He has refused to bow to pressure from Spain, and has left the situation in the hands of his manager. And for this, he gets abuse. Explain that one to me. No seriously, explain it.

5. FC Barcelona

More than a club, my arse. If they didn’t play beautiful football, they would perhaps be the most reviled club on the planet. On the field, their stunning football outweighs the shameless play-acting in the eyes of many, but off it, their mockery of the simple laws of the game shows arrogance to the extreme. Relentless tapping up is just the tip of the iceberg, although in fairness, it could hardly be said to be working – if Xavi thinks his latest comments making the Cesc transfer more likely, then he needs a psychology lesson, specifically around the term ‘strengthening resolve‘.

6. Ligament tears

Whenever I hear of one of our players tearing a ligament, my first reaction is ‘you idiot, how long are we going to be without you?’. No more. Well, I’ll still have that reaction, but it will be preceded by a modicum of sympathy, because, as it turns out, ligament tears are painful.

I know this because I am recovering from one – I had knee surgery a little over a month ago and walking is still nigh on impossible. Which means I am sitting down a lot, which in turn means I’m forced to flick on to Sky Sports News after a while, and catch sight of Harry bloody Redknapp.

So the next time RVP knackers his leg, I’ll imagine him in pain, throwing the remote at the television, and I’ll feel a twinge of sympathy. Only then will I curse him for being absent.

7. Transfer window lingo

Rules of the transfer window:

• All young players are starlets or wonderkids, and all must be labelled ‘the new X‘, where X is a fading star. The players need not have anything in common.
• All transfer bids are ‘swoops’.
• All transfer requests are ‘shocks’ that ‘stun’ clubs.
• All players subject to bids are ‘wantaway’.
• An ‘understanding’ allows a story to be categorically true, despite the lack of quotes, or indeed sensibility in the subject matter.
• Players can have daily medicals from the moment you first ‘break the story’ until they day they officially sign. There is no need to backtrack, ever.

8. Overt cynicism

I can understand a bit of skepticism from time to time. When Wenger says that Almunia has an elbow injury that last three months, smirking as he says so, a certain level of doubt is to be expected. When Samir Nasri says it is all about club ambition, we can frown and respectfully disagree. But the dearth of summer stories means that too often the tidbits are analysed to a ridiculous degree. Take the photos published of the players’ first day back at training. You had people claiming Nasri was staying because he was smiling in a photo, but in another shot he looked more serious, which obviously meant that contract negotiations had stalled. Now, I don’t know about you, but my expressions have a habit of changing based on slightly less career-changing facts than those, but perhaps footballers are different, eh?

And then, people start doubting every news story. Arsenal’s official line is that Cesc picked up a muscular injury in his thigh on his first day back, hence him missing the current tour. Immediately, this was dismissed, not by a vocal minority, but by a substantial chunk of the fanbase. Obviously we are selling him and this is a cover story.

Er, hang on a moment. First day back after holiday, and a return to physical training. Yep, sounds to me like one of the likeliest days to pick up a muscular injury.

9. People purporting to speak for others

Let’s get this straight. This blog is my opinion only. I do not profess to speak for anyone else. It really irritates me when I read people saying that ‘all real fans think so-and-so‘, or ‘we all want X‘, an increasingly prevalent practice used by those who wish to artificially enhance the gravitas of what they are saying.

I speak for me, you speak for you, and never should anything else be true.

10. Online player abuse

When did we, as a race, drop all sense of decorum and start flinging the most personal of abuse at people who do not come close to deserving it? How exactly does the salary of a Premiership footballer mean that the masses feel entitled to act like complete morons to the players within the club they claim to support?

I am well aware than footballers have to put up with a certain level of ‘banter’ on the terraces, but that is different because there is a purpose behind it – it is designed to put them off their game. Most of the chants have a great deal of humour in them, which cannot be said when you switch to the online world. But pick any footballer on Twitter, and have a look at their ‘mentions’ section. It is truly a portal to hell, and frankly I’m amazed they last long at all. Not only is the abuse ridiculously harsh and personal, it usually comes from the club’s own fans.

Footballers have to be thick skinned. But they are also human, and deserve better. I’m not sure I’d want to stay at a club at which I was routinely lambasted by my own fans. And yet we wonder why they sometimes seem cagey when playing in front of a home crowd. Food for thought, hmm?

———-

As ever, feel free to comment below. I know I’ve touched on some fairly inflammatory subjects tonight and you may well disagree with some of my views, and that’s absolutely fine. As I said, I speak only for me. Now it’s your turn.

1. Hands off. Talk to the players before the game, and indicate that if any player touches you to restrict your motion in any way, they will be sent off. Apologetic shoulder taps are fine, holding your hands down to prevent you booking someone is most definitely not. I was watching the Huddersfield-Bournemouth playoff in midweek, at at one point Kevin Kilbane charged after a Bournemouth player, only for the referee to stand in his way to calm him down. He promptly shoved the official back, who was rightly furious. I was sure a red card would follow, but only a yellow was produced for what is a clear sending off offence. Shockingly weak refereeing.

2. Hounding. A few years ago, referees were given the guidance that if players descended on them en masse, they are entitled and correct to start issuing cards. Ever seen it happen? One of the key points of the campaign was that the captain is the sole voice of the team. If players have something to say to the officials, it should be done through him. Scenes like last weekend when Phil Dowd was hounded by half the United team seeking a penalty should not occur – Dowd was correct to send them away (and correct to award the penalty, incidentally), but Vidic in particular should have seen a card. Start producing them and the problem will go away.

3. Teach them the rules. Have ten rulebooks in your pocket ready to hand to players who clearly are oblivious to the laws of the game. Classic example that you see in practically every match – a player commits a foul deemed worthy of a yellow card, only to protest ‘first one! first one!‘ at the official. At which point he should answer ‘Yes, it is your first foul. But in the rules, it clearly says you can be booked either for a yellow card offence, or persistent fouling. Which do you think I’m doing? Now here’s your rulebook. And your yellow card.‘

4. Dissent. Always book players for dissent. Players can gently question a decision or show disappointment or dismay if something doesn’t go their way. No problem with that – we don’t want to neuter the game, after all. But if anyone charges up to a linesman in anger or yells ‘fuck off‘ at the referee (Rooney wouldn’t last ten minutes), give them the yellow card. No warnings. It seems dissent is accepted in the game as long as you don’t commit the atrocious act of, wait for it, kicking the ball away. Clearly that is the most offensive form of dissent out there. Complete nonsense.

5. Stop players running the game. If a player asks for you to produce a yellow card, do so. But for him. Another key point of Respect is that it is designed to prevent players from trying to run the game. I don’t care that Barcelona would end their first two matches with seven players left on the pitch, they would soon learn. As long as the players have due warning before the game, they can have absolutely no complaints.

6. Stop accepting abuse. A player swearing at themselves is fine. A player swearing at you is not. Again, this isn’t a case of dialing down the passion in the game, but players need to learn to direct their anger appropriately. There was a classic example years ago in an Arsenal-Everton League Cup tie, officiated by Graham Poll, who sent Everton’s James McFadden off in the early stages after a decision didn’t go his way, McFadden appeared to yell ‘You fucking cheat‘ to Poll, and since questioning the integrity of an official should always been met with a red card, the sending off made sense. But McFadden later said that his accent made Poll mishear what he actually said, which was ‘You’re fucking shite‘, which misses the point entirely – that is still foul, abusive and insulting language directed at the referee, which is also a red card offence. It says a lot that he considered this to be a reasonable defence.

7. Explain yourself. Talk to the press after the game. Now, this isn’t in the hands of the referees themselves, it is the FA that deny them this option, but it would not hurt to lobby for it. Every time an official has explained their decisions (even mistakes) to managers and press officers, they’ve instantly gained respect from all parties and the sense that there was logic and reason to what they did. Every time former officials have appeared alongside pundits, they have given fascinating insights. It makes them more human, and it makes them harder to criticise. Is that not the whole point of the campaign?

8. Challenge the liars. Make players be more honest with you. If, for example, a player cries ‘I got the ball‘, after you’ve given a foul against them, say ‘I’ll be looking at a replay of this incident after the match. I’ll be able to see whether I was wrong, or whether you are a liar. Care to tell me in advance?’. I’d love the official to even have the power to award retrospective yellow cards to players who insist on something that plainly isn’t true.

9. Apply the rules. Stop thinking that you have a responsibility to a) keep the game flowing or b) keep 22 players on the field. Both notions are invented by managers and pundits, who are serving their own self-interests. You have a responsibility to apply to rules of the game. So if someone commits a foul in the 10th minute that you would show a yellow card for in the 80th, show them the damn yellow card. Forget that the pundits will say ‘he has set a precedent here‘ or some such nonsense – you are doing nothing of the sort. You are applying the rules, and it will help to achieve the much sought after consistency we all bang on about.

10. Use mics. Not for public consumption, clearly – trying to follow rugby’s example of allowing viewers to listen to everything being said is a step too far. But if all conversations between referees and players are recorded, then managers, pundits and disciplinary officials can hear exactly what has gone on in any circumstance. And perhaps select snippets could be used in the post-match analysis.

I don’t consider any of these to be particularly revolutionary, which is why I fail to understand why they don’t happen. And I certainly don’t buy the argument that six players per match would be sent off if these rules were implemented. I know some footballers are a bit dim, but if you see players being sent off for mouthing at the referee every week, chances are you’ll think twice before going down the same road. And if they know in advance what the consequences are, they have no recourse.

Most important of all – when you, as a referee, have a helpful rule at your disposal, use it. Time and time again they’ve been given the opportunity to clamp down, and they always seem afraid to act. I suspect the FA are largely to blame here – many officials have said in the past that if they acted decisively, they would not be wholeheartedly supported by the governing body. That has to change.

We all get mad at officials. But can anyone say the above pointers wouldn’t help?

Perhaps that isn’t surprising – almost all Barcelona’s games are over by the hour mark, so they’ve never had to maintain that intensity for ninety minutes. Their style requires extreme fitness, and they were unable to sustain it. It is a testament to our fitness that despite giving up more possession than in any other match in recent times, we finished the stronger.

As for the goals, they were something to behold. Valdes was certainly at fault for Van Persie’s equaliser, beaten at his near post from an impossible angle, but to focus solely on that does Van Persie a massive disservice – only extreme power and precision made that goal possible, and his recent form was required to give him the confidence to attempt such an audacious effort.

If that was good, the winner was astonishing. One minute Barcelona were outnumbering us on the edge of our own box, but three sublime passes later Nasri was racing down the wing, before cutting inside and laying the perfect ball inside to Arshavin, whose pass-finish from the edge of the area was Pire-esque. High praise indeed.

I’m not going to do a blow-by-blow match report – I imagine that every single one watched the match, soaking in every last detail. Instead, I want to focus on ten points that made the night so special.

1. The best team in the world came to town, and played at their scorching best. Despite all of that, they lost. Say what you like about their control of possession and their chances – they certainly could have scored more, particularly if Messi had not misplaced his shooting boots. But it takes more than luck to beat the best side in a generation when they are playing at that level. It takes something special just to avoid a hammering, let alone triumph. Whatever happens in the Nou Camp, this was the finest night the Emirates has seen.

2. It was also the loudest the Emirates has ever been – a remarkable atmosphere, contrary to the stereotypical Arsenal home game. Each of the players has acknowledged the extraordinary support they received – it was spine-tingling at times. When Arshavin completed that special move for the winner, the place erupted.

3. Every criticism laid at the door of this team was countered. Apparently we have no mental strength, no keeper, no centre halves and no leader. Nonsense. Fragile teams would have got hammered, Szczesny made crucial saves and never looked out of place despite it being the toughest of European debuts, Koscielny was simply remarkable at centre half and there were leaders all over the pitch. Everyone stood up to be counted. Alan Hansen, eat your heart out, you cliché-ridden monstrosity.

4. Jack Wilshere is the finest English talent in years, certainly from a technical standpoint – when was the last time you saw an English player so comfortable with the ball in tight spaces? Just as a quick reminder – he is 19 years old. A remarkable performance from a man rightly receiving plaudits in Spain today, he destroyed and created, never taking more touches than he needed to. A special talent, and as pointed out at Gunnerblog, he is Arsenal through and through.

5. Our fears about Eboue were misplaced. I’ve seen quite a bit of criticism of the Ivorian today, but I must have been watching a different game. He gave the ball away sloppily a couple of times, but that is to be expected of a player in and out of the side under this kind of pressure. Overall, I thought he handled himself very well, and Barcelona were unable to create much down his flank.

6. Robin Van Persie is one of the best strikers in the world, and would be recognised as such if he wasn’t forever injured. Last season he played twenty games, and was directly involved (scored or assisted) in eighteen goals. After last night’s equaliser, he has the same superb record this campaign. He is in stunning form, he has matured into a leader on and off the pitch, and crucially, he is fit. If that stays the case until May, we should lift something.

7. Szczesny could be Arsenal number one for the next twelve years. A year ago he was on loan at Brentford, six months ago he was clearly unhappy with his position at the club, watching Almunia and Fabianski given repeated chances and not even knowing whether he was ahead of Mannone in the pecking order. Now, he is surely first choice even when Fabianski returns, and despite a baptism of fire (Premiership debut against United, European debut against Barcelona), nothing fazes him. Popular amongst the players, it is easy to forget he is 20 years old. A baby in goalkeeping terms.

8. The age of these players is remarkable – 20, 25, 25, 24, 27, 23, 23, 19, 23, 21, 27. Read that again. Eboue and Van Persie, at 27, were the oldest members of a team that just stood toe to toe with the best side in the world and triumphed. Six of them are 23 or under. Not a single one of them has reached their peak yet. Let the thought of what could be make you smile.

9. Despite what Chris Waddle says, Theo Walcott has a football brain. Last night he caused Barcelona problems early on, but perhaps more importantly he gave fantastic support to Eboue on the flank, chasing and harrying time and time again in what was a very disciplined performance. Also, if he was mentally weak, you would expect him to go to pieces in the big games, but he is the complete opposite. His first goal for Arsenal was in the Carling Cup final, he went on that mazy run against Liverpool in the Champions League, turned the first leg of the Barcelona tie around last season, and was superb against Chelsea before Christmas. He is a big game player.

10. We’ve got Cesc Fabregas, complete with fist-pumping determination at the final whistle – he is ours, and he is proud to be ours.

I still haven’t come down from last night’s excitement. Anyone still wish we’d won our group?

1. Chamakh. Wenger’s first signing of the year looks to be a belter. Looked lively throughout, scored a composed goal, and the standing ovation he was afforded when substituted in the second half said it all. But his end product was only half the story - I spent a few minutes just watching his movement, the way he was dragging Milan defenders this way and that, and any opponent of his is going to be in for a tough time this season. We knew he was good in the air, but he is intelligent, calm, and decent on the deck too, capped by one outrageous piece of skill where he controlled a forty yard pass with a Cruyff turn. Not bad for a free transfer.

2. Koscielny. Prior to the game, all I could focus on was how scrawny our new centre half is. And while true, watching him in action makes you realise that although he needs hours in the gym, he could become a terrific defender once his physical stature improves. And to be fair, he was biting into tackles in a way that made him seem more imposing than his slight frame would suggest. Excellent reading of the game, pacey, and on this evidence, first choice. Wenger still has time to demote him with a new signing, but he appears to be ahead of Djourou in the pecking order, and capable of forming a solid partnership with Vermaelen.

3. Cesc is staying. I cannot for one second agree with anyone who thinks we would be better off with a boatload of cash.

4. Much of our forward line is still to return. Milan are known for their defensive tenacity, and while some of that discipline is missing in pre-season, it was still very encouraging to see how often we stretched them without Cesc, Van Persie and Bendtner available. Bear in mind that the trio, along with Arshavin, were expected to create everythinglast season, and you can see the shift. That said, we could do with Van Persie or Bendtner firing early in the season to take some of the pressure away from Chamakh – once he was taken off, we looked lightweight up front.

5. Nasri looks ready to step up. It is easy to forget that the Frenchman had no pre-season last year, missing the early stages of the campaign with a broken leg. But his performances over the last couple of weeks, coupled with some from early in 2010, suggest that this year could be his breakthrough year.

6. Wilshere is not going out on loan. Confirmed by Wenger, the 18 year old will now be given chances in the first team that many believe are overdue. There is no doubting we’ve been careful with young Jack, and rightly so, but having impressed with Bolton last season, he has proven himself ready for Premiership action. Had Joe Cole been signed, another loan may have been on the cards, but at ten years Cole’s junior, Wilshere is the long term option.

7. Competition for places. I should caveat this point by saying injuries may dictate the team, but it is an oft spoken truth that you need two players for every slot in the team. Gibbs and Clichy look set to battle for the left back berth, a fit Djourou will be itching to play, Eboue will challenge Sagna, Frimpong was excellent again and may have moved ahead of Eastmond to be Song’s understudy, and the wealth of attacking midfielders will all be looking to stake their claims. Up front, we have three able to lead the line, and even more to play just behind. Any position without injuries will be hard fought.

Plenty to be positive about there, but there are still some concerns. We are only just heading into August, so any issues have time to be resolved, but a few things still worry me:

1. Defending set pieces. You could see it coming, and Milan aren’t even as proficient from set plays as many we will face this season. But once again a simple ball defeated three defenders, and a free header was planted past Fabianski, who I feel was blameless. It is a weakness that persists, and to resolve it we need to stop allowing strikers to make the runs they want. Pato was free to do as he pleased.

2. The keeper situation. In fairness, Fabianski did nothing wrong, but then he actually had nothing to do – no chance for the goal or when his crossbar was struck, and no other notable saves to make. More and more it seems he may become our first choice, and while I’ve backed him vigorously in the past, that still makes me nervous.

3. Lack of centre halves. To be fair, I’m less concerned about this because Wenger himself acknowledges the need to strengthen, but we need to get any new player in quickly because otherwise we are left with Vermaelen, aninjury prone Djourou and Koscielny, who could still be raw (asking him to make Vermaelen’s instant impact is unfair). For me, we need someone powerful to prevent the likes of Stoke running amok, and quickly.

Overall, I’m feeling hugely positive. Two out of three issues can be solved with the pair of signings we all want – centre back and keeper – and an improvement in both departments may also help eradicate our weakness against set pieces. In addition, the presence of Chamakh means our keepers finally get practice against a striker who is a real threat in the air. They’ll need it.

Next up, Celtic.

Some would have you believe that our season is over already, and are already going through the process of deciding who we should buy and sell in the summer. Hang on a second. We’re three points off the pace in the Premiership – we have plenty left to play for. Isn’t the summer madness long and painful enough without starting a month early?

I haven’t done one of these lists for a while, but I decided to because a) they don’t actually take that long and I’m pushed for time tonight, and b) I wanted to remind people why there are plenty of reasons to stay positive. Here we go.

1) We got as far in the Champions League as any English club, further than Chelsea and miles beyond Liverpool.

2) We may have been ultimately outclassed by Barcelona, but we gave them a scare, which is more than most, and we did it by playing football, not by using underhand tactics. They are the likely, and deserving, champions.

3) On Wednesday, we could celebrate St Totteringham’s Day at White Hart Lane. Having won the league there a few years back, it would be another reason to chuckle at the expense of our neighbours.

4) We have had more injuries than last season, yet have improved domestically. What does that say about those that stayed fit? How much have they improved?

5) We have a manager with class. Tony Pulis can continue his personal vendetta by spouting all sorts of nonsense in the press, but his team are filled with players who break legs and fight with each other, so what kind of moral code do you expect? Wenger, rightly, is keeping quiet and letting our football do the talking.

6) No matter how bad things get, put yourself in Liverpool’s shoes. Having spent far more than we have, they are sixth in the Premiership, they lost in the League Cup to our kids, to a Championship side at home in the FA Cup, went out of the Champions League in the group stage, and have warring owners. Oh, and a manager who is probably off in the summer.

7) Van Persie, Djourou and Gibbs may all play before the end of the season.

8) We are signing a player in the summer who keeps scoring crucial goals for Bordeaux, both domestically and in crucial European games. And we aren’t paying a penny for him.

9) Our financial approach is sustainable, and our debt manageable, unlike the rest of the Premiership’s top brass.

10) We have a team spirit this season that hasn’t been matched in some years, largely because certain negative influences (here’s looking at you Adebayor) have gone. The fight is there for all to see.

No-one is pretending that everything is perfect. I know certain things have to change, and my guess is that Wenger does too. But the way some people are talking, you would think that we were tenth in the league, not in with a chance of lifting the title. I guess some people prefer to moan than look at the obvious evidence in front of them that says we’ve improved dramatically in a year.

Stay happy. We’ve got Spurs to teach a lesson to on Wednesday.

Italia 90 was my first World Cup, and I remember the old format – groups of four with one qualifier, groups of five with two, and since there was a lack of genuine minnows (no San Marinos back then), all the games were tough. France, Denmark and, ironically, Portugal failed to qualify despite having far better records against far tougher opposition than the Portuguese have managed this time around.

2. If the European system is bad, then the South American is a joke. Argentina lost six games and still qualified. How can a small nation possibly overachieve for eighteen games and qualify?

3. Argentina might have qualified, but under Maradona they are no threat for the World Cup itself. They look utterly disjointed, lacking in any tactical plan, and reliant on a couple of individuals to fire them through. Look at their team on Wednesday – some of it was excellent (Messi, Mascherano, Higuain), but the rest aren’t likely to scare anyone. Romero, Otamedi, and di Maria are all inexperienced, Veron will be 35 in March, and Guiterrez is hardly lighting up the Championship with Newcastle. And with Maradona in charge, there is always scope for crazy selections – Aguero wasn’t even on the bench.

4. David Beckham looks like an idiot. Seriously, what is with the caveman look?

5. Mind you, he can still play a bit, and will surely go to South Africa. But giving him the man of the match award for a half an hour appearance is a slap in the face for the rest of the players.

6. What has happened to Romania? Once a force in world football, they ended fifth in their group, sandwiched in between Lithuania and the Faroes, having been hammered 5-0 by Serbia at the weekend. Gheorghe Hagi must be despairing.

7. Croatia have fallen a long way since Euro 2008 too, where they were seconds away from the semi final. Ukraine’s inevitable victory over Andorra put them out, and to add insult to injury, neighbours Serbia won France’s group and even Bosnia have made the playoffs.

8. Egypt are doing their best to continue their woeful qualifying record – they haven’t played in the competition since 1990, despite winning the African Nations Cup three times since (twice, ironically, in the year of World Cups they failed to reach – 1998 and 2006). They must now beat Algeria, their undefeated group leaders, by three goals in the final match to qualify. A two goal victory would actually see both sides finish with identical records, and a 3-1 victory would cancel out the scoreline Algeria won their first meeting by, and would result in the drawing of lots.

9. The FIFA World Rankings are a joke. Looking at the top 25 to see who had surprisingly failed to qualify, you’ll find Croatia in ninth, which is a fair reflection of their recent success, the Czechs in 18th after a woeful campaign, Bulgaria in 19th, and then, in 22nd, Israel. Israel??? Fourth behind Switzerland, Greece and Latvia (who are, incidentally, way down in 47th, two places behind Gabon) in the current group, they also came fourth in qualifying for Euro 2008, and haven’t played in a major tournament since their one and only appearance in the World Cup in 1970. Why are they up in 22nd?

10. International fortnights stretch on painfully. Okay, we already knew that one.

At last, it is over, and from tomorrow, the real football returns. I’ll be previewing that later. Until then, enjoy your Friday.

1. Eboue to Inter Milan. Starting with one that the media are blameless for, we have Eboue, having a terrible season but apparently coveted by Inter. Now, all Mourinho probably remembers Eboue for is breaking John Terry’s foot, and that alone isn’t likely to appeal. This seems to be a classic case of an agent making a player believe he is a lot better/more desired than he really is.

2. Yaya Toure from Barcelona. Brother already at the club – check. Plays in a position we’re short in – check. Perfect story! Except for the fact that if Wenger had ever wanted the younger Toure, he would already have him. He’s had plenty of chances to sign Yaya, including a trial a few years ago, and this story is just pure media laziness.

3. Charles N’Zogbia from Newcastle. “It’s my dream to play for Arsenal”. Big whoop, it’s mine too, but unfortunately, I’m a bit rubbish, and so are you, Charles.

4. Tevez from MSI. If United don’t intend to buy Tevez, some are saying he’ll leave in January. First off, why would he leave in January when his loan runs until the summer? And secondly, if United don’t want to pay 32 million for him, there’s no way we will.

5. Cesc and RVP to Barcelona for 45m. Another classic media syndrome – when journalists continue to out do each other until the lie is so fanciful it is reported as a ‘story’. Snore.

6. Diaby to Inter. Another apparent exit as part of the ‘crisis exodus’, Arsenal are apparently going to sell a man they are currently showing a lot of faith in. Okay then.

7. David Villa from Valencia. Yes, they’re in financial trouble, and yes, they probably will sell. But not until the summer.

8. Walcott anywhere. There are various rumours flying around that Walcott will walk at the end of the season for free, so will instead be sold early. This is frankly ridiculous.

9. Wenger to Real Madrid. What genius keeps thinking of this one? Wenger loves the stability and backing at Arsenal, and constantly says how managing Real would not be for him. So why the constant rumours?

10. Okay, so there are only nine.

I was sorely tempted to add Arshavin in as number ten, because I find myself having serious doubts as to whether we’re actually that interested. I wouldn’t be surprised if Spurs or Man City came in with 18m-20m and snapped him up, and I’m not even entirely sure Wenger would be that fussed.

But as for the rest, it strikes me that the press can’t even be bothered to make up new stories anymore. I’m slightly surprised we haven’t had more stories about Frey, Given, Buffon and Trezeguet.

February can’t come soon enough.

2. Despite many predicting that Villa will break the Big Four hold, they actually only managed 58 points in 2008, far fewer than the big teams, because they amassed only 20 points in 18 games at the end of last season. Given that their squad is no bigger this time around, and that their European interest is still strong, it would not be a surprise for history to repeat itself and their challenge to fade.

3. Statistics would actually point to Everton being the closest challengers to the big teams this season, after amassing 64 points in 2008. They’ve done it before, back in 2005, but have to come from behind to do it this time, unlike that season.

4. We have kept clean sheets in only fourteen of 38 games, only around a third, which is plainly not good enough. Proportionally however, we managed the same in the first half of 2008 as the second half, which actually suggests that the oft-mooted reason of Flamini leaving in the summer may not be the whole story.

5. We have failed to score four times in 2008, against Wigan last season, and Fulham, Villa and Man City this. Four in 38 is not too bad, but the opposition the shut outs have come against have been a surprise.

6. Fourteen times in 2008 we scored in a Premiership match but didn’t win it. On three of those occasions we managed two goals without winning, while that match against Spurs saw our four goals still not bring the points home.

7. Of the fourteen matches we scored in but did not win, we actually led in nine of them, but could not hold on to the advantage. No other big side lets leads slip as often as us.

8. The often spoken points target of 40 points to avoid relegation is now a myth. Last season six clubs failed to reach the magic number, while 36 was enough to save Fulham. This season should be similar, with Bolton 11th and still only heading for 43 points. 36-37 should be enough once again in the closest relegation battle in years.

9. Perhaps the biggest unheralded success story of 2008 has been Wigan. In the drop zone this time last year, they have managed 52 points in the calendar year and in only 37 games. If they keep that up they’ll be in Europe next term.

10. Arsenal finally managed to win again at Stamford Bridge, and mirrored the 2003/04 success by coming from behind to triumph 2-1. And that season’s team did okay, really…

1. If you play the ball past an opponent and run into them, they will get a yellow card irrespective of whether they moved to block your path, or simply stood their ground, as they are permitted to do.

2. Once added on time has been announced, it can only be increased by serious injuries. Any goals (which should add an additional minute) or substitutions (which should add thirty seconds) after the announcements will not increase the total.

3. Speaking of injury time, there can only be whole minutes of it. ‘There will be a minimum of three minutes’ does not mean there could be 3:15, 3:40 or even 3:59 of added time, it means precisely three minutes.

4. The ‘Sensible Soccer’ rule: The full time whistle can only be blown when the ball is in the middle third of the pitch, preferably after a defensive clearance.

5. If the ball strikes you on the hand anywhere on the pitch, it is always a free kick. But if you are inside your own penalty area, it has to have been deliberate, otherwise the award of a penalty is deemed ‘harsh’.

6. You cannot be booked twice in the same incident. You can use this to your advantage if you have committed a foul you know you’ll be booked for, by riling the other player into reacting. Even if your reactions are equal, they will receive a yellow card for it and you will only get the yellow for the initial foul.

7. For the first 85 minutes of the game, you can take twenty seconds preparing to take a throw in, and if losing or drawing, that continues. But if you are winning by a single goal and in the final five minutes, make sure you take the throw in within five seconds or you’ll be booked for timewasting. This is especially the case if you are the underdog and under the cosh away from home.

8. You may be penalised for raising your foot too high if you take the ball above waist height. But overhead kicks are fine, even if the ball is an inch from the defender’s nose when you strike it.

9. And on the topic of being penalised for a raised foot, if two players go for the same high ball, the one who wins the ball will always be the one who gives away the free kick.

10. To get a free kick for a shirt pull while chasing after the ball, all you have to do is stop running and shrug in frustration towards the referee. This works even if it was you doing the shirt pulling.

Feel free to add your own…

1. Robinho. Consistently linked, you have to imagine that if Wenger really wanted to sign him for a considerable fee, he would have done so already. He has gone on record to say he admires the Brazilian, but the fees that are being suggested are simply out of the question.

2. Roque Santa Cruz .Adebayor scored thirty goals last season, Van Persie can score twenty five if fit. Walcott is beginning to shine, Bendtner is waiting in the wings and Vela will be used as a squad striker. Plus Eduardo is on the mend. Sure, not many of these are established, but you can’t become established until given the chance, much like Ade this season. Wenger will not sign a striker this summer.

3. Mauro Zarate. Nothing like a few good games to suddenly get the media salivating. Zarate, on loan from Qatar club Al Saad (where he’d been dropped), produced the odd moment of magic for Birmingham, but was inconsistent, and didn’t convince McLeish to regularly start him. Now, apparently, Arsenal are interested in paying over 10 million for him. I think not.

4. Yaya Toure. Kolo’s little brother can be as interested as he wants in joining him at Arsenal, but he has had trials here before, and Wenger had plenty of opportunities to sign him. He chose not to, and I see no reason why he would now.

5. David Villa. Another who is interested in coming, but Wenger isn’t interested in signing. He is an excellent striker, but we’re stocked in that department.

6. Sebastien Frey. Another summer, another link to Frey. Watch for the links to Buffon, I’m sure those equally unfounded stories will crop up in time.

7. Alberto Aquilani. Classic agent garbage – “Aquilani is speaking to Arsenal. We will have to see if Roma will be able to match his demands.” Watch him sign a new contract in the coming weeks, earning his agent a nice fat paycheck.

8. Lillian Thuram. Seriously, when was the last time Wenger signed a 36 year old?

9. Thierry Henry. Wenger sold him, he hasn’t looked that great since, is now more injury prone than ever and the wrong side of thirty. Plus Wenger never re-signs players he has previously sold. He’ll always be a legend, but he isn’t coming back.

10. David Dein. No matter what he plants in newspapers, no matter what he says or does now, he isn’t returning, at least while the current board are in charge. Edelman may have gone, but he was far from Dein’s only enemy, and the orange one’s actions over the past year make this utterly impossible.