Am I the only one despairing at the notion that Samir Nasri was ever likely to pick up a three match ban for stepping on Richard Garcia’s foot on Saturday? The suggestion that it constituted violent conduct in any way would have been laughable were it not for the fact that the media backlash could have made a ridiculous situation a reality.

Nasri walked over Garcia’s foot. It was stupid, petulant and designed to rile. Just like goading an opponent, squaring up to them, or doing that stupid rutting thing we see too often, it was petulant, childish, and deserved a yellow card, as all of those offences do.

Violent it most certainly was not. Had Nasri raised his foot to knee height and brought it crashing down, then it would have been, but he didn’t. That his ‘escape’ of a three match ban is even newsworthy shows just how skewed the disciplinary priorities are in this country.

If an opponent is flying past you, and you react by cynically and deliberately hacking them to the ground, you get a yellow card. Yet surely that is far worse (and far more violent) than some of these incidents. To ban Nasri would have been equivalent to the pathetic suspension Aliadiere picked up for flicking Mascherano’s face last year. Stupidity dropped to a new level that day.

For the record, I also agree with the decision not to ban Barmby for his push to Nasri’s face in the subsequent melee. I fail to see why the authorities don’t differentiate between that innocuous action, and those the ‘raised hands’ rule was brought in for – punches and slaps. There is clearly a varying level of violence going on, yet the punishments don’t reflect that.

I remember years ago (97/98 season, since you asked), Alan Shearer, then England captain, viciously roundhouse kicked Neil Lennon in the head while he lay prone on the ground. Despite condemnation for a plainly violent act, he was banned for just three matches. If you lightly push an opponent in the face, and they collapse in a dramatic heap, you get the same spell on the sidelines. How is that justice?

For me, the three match ban, given for an entire scale of offences, has long been an overly simplistic system. In a way, I can see why it exists – a sliding scale of suspensions would give managers, fans, and the media chance to compare unfavourably, and suggest that X got off lightly compared to Y.

But right now, the system makes no sense. The inflexibility means that idiocy, violent conduct, or even doing a Martin Taylor get punished as equivalent offences, which they plainly are not.

On a sliding scale, it could be argued that a one match ban for Nasri would be fair. Or a six match ban for the sort of leg breaking challenges we still see. To be forced in a ‘three match ban or nothing’ decision fails to take into account that a completely different punishment may be justified.

But then, when did discipline at the FA ever make sense?

 

One thing about not blogging for a week is you can sit back and watch the hysterical reactions going on in the world of football without feeling like you have to dive in and add your voice. It has been one of those weeks.

First we had the curse of the international break rear its ugly head again, in the form of injuries to Van Persie and Gibbs. The timing of the former is painful because he was on such a hot streak, and with important games coming up it helps to have the players likely to strike fear into the opponents. For the latter, it is also a blow, but for different reasons – with Clichy out, Gibbs had a great chance to stake his claim for a regular first team spot. Ask Fabianski how a mistimed injury can drop you down the pecking order.

But in both cases, panic spread like wildfire, only for subsequent reports to confirm that the injuries were not as bad as initially feared. Which, frankly, made some of the outlandish statements made in the interim seem all the more foolhardy. As soon as the Dutchman collapsed on the turf, our season was being written off, a bizarre conclusion given how many goalscorers we have. As it turns out, Gibbs might be fit in just over a week, with Van Persie returning just after Christmas. It isn’t ideal, but it isn’t a crisis either.

If you were to make me select positions to lose players to injury, I’d plump for strikers and left backs, as we have the cover. Just wrap Gallas and Vermaelen up in cotton wool and we’ll be fine.

And then we have the internationals. Fans and the media do like to get overboard from time to time, don’t they? We had Eduardo, and now we have ‘Handball-Gate’, the inevitable title of last night’s incident. For those who don’t know, you must be living under a rock, but essentially Henry instinctively (perhaps) handled the ball, crossed for Gallas, who scored to put France into the World Cup.

And that’s about it. Was it a clear handball? Yes. Was it deliberate? That depends largely on whether you consider instinct to be the same thing. Should the goal have stood? Absolutely not.

But it was one of a million incidents that referees and linesmen miss. Yes, somehow, this has got the footballing public into such a flurry that we have fans calling in to Sky to get the match replayed, and beyond that, Kevin Kilbane and Liam Brady are demanding the match to be null and void.

Some go even further – one caller on Sky Sports was comparing Henry’s actions with the business world, where fraud can land you in jail. Has the world gone mad? Even the Irish Justice Minister waded in:

“They probably won’t grant it as we are minnows in world football but let’s put them on the spot. Otherwise, if that result remains, it reinforces the view that if you cheat, you will win.”

Kilbane said:

“Well, I’d like to think it would be replayed and I think everyone in the squad would like it replayed.”

What possible grounds are there for replaying the game? Imagine the precedent – suddenly every team that loses to a goal that shouldn’t have stood because of a handball or a foul could demand the same. Or to take it further, maybe a result is canned because a throw in was awarded the wrong way, leading to the winning goal. After all, the argument here is that Henry deliberately cheated – is appealing for a throw you know isn’t yours any different?

It is beyond ridiculous. Yes, it is a harsh way to go out, but it is hardly new. I remember South Korea knocking Italy out in 2002 thanks to a series of horrendous refereeing decisions. Australia lost to Italy in 2006 to a penalty that wasn’t. Did anyone demand a replay then? Of course not.

Get a fucking grip.

Disclaimer – please don’t think this is an anti-Irish rant. Strangely enough, most of the hysterical reactions have come from the English media and English fans. Most Irish I’ve seen mention the incident are understandably pissed off but at the same time accept that’s how football is sometimes. Check out an excellent post by Arseblogger (who is Irish) for evidence of rationality.

 

Man United 2 (Rooney pen 59, Diaby og 64) Arsenal 1 (Arshavin 40)
(Premiership)

I missed Saturday’s game as it was the last day of our club’s cricket season, but having listened to it on the radio, and now watched the whole match in retrospect, I finally feel in a position to comment. There is so much to focus on from the match, but let’s start with the actual football first.

United were poor throughout, and we were in complete control of the first half without ever creating all that much. Eventually, seconds after he should have had a penalty for Fletcher’s clattering, Arshavin picked up the ball thirty yards out and smashed it past Foster, who should have done much better. That was how it stood at half time.

The second half improvement from United never came, and only Foster kept them in the game with a stunning save from Van Persie. Soon after, Rooney won a penalty when Almunia caught him – he picked himself up and struck the equaliser home from the spot.

Van Persie then came close to restoring our lead, striking the crossbar with a free kick, before we gifted them the winner, Diaby heading home Giggs’ free kick when under no real pressure. We searched for an equaliser, but didn’t test Foster again until injury time, when Van Persie’s goal was correctly disallowed for offside against Gallas. Wenger was sent to the stands in the aftermath.

Now, you’ll notice I’ve been very factual there, not going into much detail for each of the flashpoints. Doing so would have made the match report an epic. Let’s look at the incidents in turn:

The Fletcher-Arshavin penalty

You won’t see many more clear cut penalties this season. Fletcher scythed into Arshavin in the box, only afterwards taking a piece of the ball before handling it for good measure. Anywhere other than Old Trafford it would be given every week.

Fortunately for Mike Dean, Wenger’s fury, and that of Arshavin, was mitigated moments later when he smashed in the opener. You could argue that this doesn’t make up for the penalty, that the Russian would have done the same later, but it was the same attack, and the goal we deserved came in due course. So although it was a dreadful decision by Dean, I don’t think it affected the result.

Rooney’s dive

Let me preface this by saying – it was a penalty. However, the actions of Eduardo midweek, and Rooney on Saturday, were absolutely 100% identical. Both players charged into the box, reached the ball before the keeper and took a dive to the turf, expecting contact. The only difference was out of their control – Boruc withdrew his hands to make the dive crystal clear, while Almunia was not as savvy or quick in his reactions, and he made contact as Rooney collapsed to the turf.

It is a crucial difference, because it turns a dive into a dive that ends with a foul, and therefore the penalty is given (technically, the dive comes first, but that would be splitting hairs). I don’t have any qualms against the decision whatsoever.

What does wind me up is the polar opposite reaction by the media following the event. You could argue that most didn’t study the pictures closely enough to realise that Rooney was halfway down before reaching Almunia, but that isn’t true for everyone. Andy Gray pointed it out in his post match analysis, but instead of calling a spade a spade (which would be Rooney a diver, Almunia clumsy and daft), he praised the striker, citing it as clever play.

The hypocrisy of that statement is remarkable. And it gets worse – Tim Rich in the Independent of Sunday attempts to defend England’s favourite troll-a-like by hinting that diving is out of character:

“It is not in Rooney’s character to throw himself over a goalkeeper, but Wenger, called Dean’s award “Old Trafford-ish”.”

While suggesting that slights on Rooney’s character would be unfair, it does at least show awareness of his past by claiming it out of character to dive over a keeper. Certainly few will forget his swan dive over Sol Campbell that ended the Invincibles run in this very fixture five years ago. But to be aware of that fact and still to back him is double standards of the extreme kind, especially when you consider the lampooning of Eduardo, a player who really doesn’t have that kind of history.

Diaby’s own goal

I sympathise a little with Diaby here – clearly of the opinion that Rooney was lurking with intent behind him, he was offered no help by Almunia, who could have a) claimed it, or b) communicated the situation. That said, Diaby was certainly not blameless for a woefully misdirected header.

Mike Dean

Irony of the day was the fact that Radio 5 were praising his performance throughout the match. Having seen the whole game, that statement is guff beyond imagination. He had a really really poor day. Cautioning six Arsenal players was incredible bearing in mind that I can barely remember a poor challenge, and it could hardly be for persistent fouling as United committed comfortably more offences (Fletcher six by himself, not including the penalty that wasn’t, and he escaped without a card).

Song and Gallas are the only two bad fould I can remember offhand – Van Persie seemed especially hard done by given that his challenge was almost identical to Fletcher’s on Arshavin.

And then there was the farcical scenes of the final moments that I’ll come on to shortly.

That said, despite his poor officialdom, I don’t believe he affected the result. The reason we lost was not the referee, it was that we capitulated from a poor position, handing United two goals they barely deserved. We have no-one to blame but ourselves.

The Wenger sending off

The most ridiculous event of the match was saved for last – following Van Persie’s disallowed goal, Wenger kicked an empty water bottle a few feet up the touchline and was duly sent to the stands by Dean, on the advice of fourth official Lee Probert.

Never mind the fact that dissent (for that is the worst it could be deemed as – had Wenger kicked the bottle at someone, it would have been a different story) carries only a yellow card for a player, it was enough for him to be dismissed by an official who knew exactly what the consequences would be.

There was nowhere for Wenger to go – Probert will have heard the disgusting chants he had to endure the entire match (the ‘Sit down you paedophile’ song has been a favourite with United fans for a decade now, for those who don’t know), but still thought it a smart idea to give the baying masses their target of hate. To his eternal credit, Wenger has never raised this chant as an issue, presumably because he knows it would ensure it would be sung at every ground, and he went and stood behind the dugout, surrounded by those same individuals, not batting an eyelid.

Eventually he was ushered down the tunnel, but the farcical nature of the situation has not gone unnoticed. Keith Hackett will by now have apologised to Wenger as promised, with Probert particularly chastised in the aftermath. Richard Bevan, LMA chief, says:

“Lee Probert totally failed to manage the situation and created a needless pressure point taking the focus away from the pitch in a big event with only a minute to go.”

Quite.

However, the bigger issue is the horrendous nature of the chant itself. The FA has a core value of making football in this country a family friendly affair, and is justifiably proud of its record of stamping out racist nonsense. But it turns a blind eye to possibly the most vile song I’ve ever heard at any stadium. And these aren’t the actions of a mindless few – there are literally thousands belting out the song.

It isn’t like it has gone unnoticed – watch the live Sky coverage of Wenger being sent to the stands, and then watch the Match of the Day highlights of the same incident. The pictures are the same, but the sound isn’t – the BBC have deliberately tried to muffle the singing, presumably aware of how hideous it is.

So why is no-one acting? Until they do, the FA have their priorities hideously mixed up.

 

July has arrived, Wimbledon has ended and the rain is pouring down outside – it must be time to return to the football. Of course if I were only to talk about what was actually happening then this might be a somewhat short blog, instead I find myself compelled to encourage you to never, ever, under any circumstances, buy the Sun again.

Okay?

They really are a tiresome lot. It is one thing to make up outlandish rumours – they do that every summer, and aren’t even necessarily the worst offenders, but to revisit the same old tired nonsense over and over is just downright pathetic. Cesc has come out numerous times to say, unequivocally, that he will not be leaving Arsenal this summer, countering every ‘story’ the day after it breaks, but still they persist.

Today, apparently, we’ve placed a £40m price tag on his head (the image of that is amusing in itself, by the same token Adebayor must be doing the bleep test with a green ‘Star Buy’ sticker on prominent display). The quote looks fairly convincing, until you realise that it came from ‘A Gunners insider’. More reliable than ‘a source close the the player’, but one step down from a columnist’s ‘understanding’, this is yet more evidence of a slow summer at the Emirates, with the papers desperate to fill pages previously reserved for a summer-long Ronaldo saga.

Even the reasoning is laughable – apparently the sale is to provide Wenger with the funds to make a challenge for the Premiership this season, as if selling your best player and replacing him with those that take a while to settle in immediately improves the side. Ah yes, Sun logic, the greatest oxymoron of them all.

But so far, nothing out of the ordinary – we’re used to seeing this level of garbage, and we’re also used to the depressing tidal wave of repeat stories on Newsnow, as the internet goes wild with panic and anger. What is slightly different this time is how the Telegraph have done what so many blogs do, and that is simply reprint the story despite its obvious absence of reality.

The Telegraph is a weird beast. Portraying itself as a respectable paper, it does deliver it certain aspects – its cricket coverage, for example, is actually very insightful – but when it comes to football rumours it is nothing more than the worst kind of tabloid masquerading as a broadsheet, willing to plumb the depths of its long lost cousins to bring in the readers desperate for a dose of transfer excitement.

On to brighter things, and the one transfer story that does appear to have legs, that of Brazilian Felipe Melo. The story seemed to be over when Melo signed an extension last week, but it seems that was an automatic clause the club simply invoked, according to the player:

“I have a contract with Fiorentina in which it was written that should I have a good first season, the club would have the possibility to extend my contract automatically from five to six years.”

Fair enough, and with that extension comes a buyout clause of €25m, roughly £21m in our money, and excitement flew around the Arsenal wires with the news that we had indeed placed a bid, with Fiorentina willing to reduce the price if Eboue was included in the deal, as stated on the Italian’s website:

“Fiorentina in turn proposed to the aforementioned club [Arsenal] a reduction in the amount set by the release clause by including right-back (Emmanuel) Eboue in the deal.”

It might just be me, but I smell something a bit iffy about all of this. We may have placed a bid, but in reality Wenger is unlikely to shell out that sort of cash on anyone, and given the past tense of Fiorentina’s statement, it seems like this deal is already dead in the water – we offered, they counter offered, and there was no meeting in the middle. Given our stance of silence in these matters, it wouldn’t surprise me if this were old news, both clubs having already moved on.

Still, we can but hope, it certainly is better than reading about Cesc’s imminent departure every week in the gutter press.

 

The state of the media in this country is downright depressing at times, especially in these lean summer months where sport sections cannot be shortened, and pages must be filled with a story designed to catch the eye of the reader.

And the one-upmanship going on is ridiculous – frankly, anyone who falls for it and buys the paper in question is a fool. Arsenal to bid for Benzema? Oh yeah, we’re sure to outbid the likes of United for a £30m striker. Okay, well how about £30m plus Bendtner for Ribery? I hope the editor cries himself to sleep at night.

Unfortunately, we live in the Sun generation, a world where the vast majority seem to believe everything they read in ‘the nation’s favourite red top’ (or more accurately, as beautifully described by Tim on 7amkickoff, ‘an open sore on the anus of society’).

And in these times of instant access to news, both accurate and bollocks, fickleness is taken to the extreme. Take a glance at many sites and comments from this week, and you’ll see Cesc and Arshavin ripped apart by ‘fans’ who worshipped them just days ago but now consider them ‘overrated’. The reason? Oh, that’ll be the Sun again, who suggested (subtly, as ever), that both wanted to both to Spain.

First Cesc explained his frustration at not winning trophies at Arsenal, but not in a ‘I want to leave’ way, but more like a genuine Arsenal fan, desperate for success. Of course the media world went bananas, but for a more rational view, check out Arseblogger’s post on the day the story broke, cutting through the crap with typical finesse.

And then this week, we have Arshavin, who wanted to move to Barcelona before he ever joined us, at a time when even joining Spurs was preferable to staying where he was, and on a very slow news day (after all, who wants to write about the Under 21s getting thumped by Germany last night?), the Sun decided to reprint his quote. Nothing like context to a story.

One consolation is that this idiocy isn’t restricted to football. I was at Wimbledon yesterday, sat in front of the big screen before Murray played another match on the road to being thumped by Federer in the final. The atmosphere was superb, and full of optimism, but ten minutes into the game, the plank behind me starting spouting more nonsense than I’ve heard down the pub in a long time. Here are some of his quotes, and bear in mind they were made after a whopping two games, with Murray 2-0 down in the first set.

“He’s bottled it, totally bottled it, it’ll be over in an hour”

“Write this set off, might as well just start playing the second now”

“Useless, I could’ve won that point, he’s not even a top 100 player really” [said after Murray had played a quite extraordinary shot that just missed]

“He’s getting hammered by an amateur!” [Wawrinka, his opponent, is in the top 20 in the world, and on yesterday's evidence, a damn good player]

“Scottish wanker, never liked him” [yeah, that's why you paid ticket money and are now sat on the hill, watching earnestly]

More and more, people around me were despairing. It was the equivalent of Villa coming to the Emirates, having a decent chance in the first minute, and the entire crowd writing our lot off as useless in the blink of an eye. It made absolutely no sense.

But then, very little does anymore. How does it make sense that the Sun has such a massive readership when their stories get more ridiculous by the day? How does it make sense that one voice of reason gets drowned out by twenty fools on Newsnow?

But fools are everywhere. Just look at the latest ramblings of the man in charge of our game. According to him, big spending=bad. But Real Madrid big spending=good, and Arsenal being frugal=bad.

Run that by me again, Sepp?

*sigh*

© 2010 The Beautiful Groan Advertise on this site Suffusion theme by Sayontan Sinha